Ditch Perfectionism: A Psychologist’s Plea to Parents to Save Kids from Anxiety

A leading cause of burnout in children is the silent but immense pressure to be perfect. A clinical psychologist is making an urgent plea to parents to abandon perfectionistic expectations, arguing that this single shift can dramatically reduce anxiety and protect a child’s mental health.
“Setting realistic goals and expectations, not driven by perfectionism, helps reduce anxiety in children,” states clinical psychologist Meghna Kanwat. When a child’s environment demands flawlessness, the fear of making a mistake can become paralyzing. This constant anxiety is a fast track to mental and emotional exhaustion.
Parents can actively dismantle this pressure by changing how they talk about success and failure. Celebrating effort, persistence, and learning from mistakes sends a much healthier message than praising only top grades. This approach fosters a “growth mindset,” where challenges are seen as opportunities to improve rather than threats to one’s self-worth.
The psychologist also notes that parents must model this behavior. If parents are highly self-critical or express anxiety about their own imperfections, children will absorb that mindset. By demonstrating self-compassion and embracing their own imperfections, parents can teach a powerful lesson in resilience.
By letting go of the need for their child to be perfect, parents give them the freedom to be human. This allows for a more joyful and less stressful learning journey, where curiosity can flourish without the shadow of anxiety. It is one of the most profound gifts a parent can give their child in today’s high-pressure world.